Showing posts with label Short Stories (English). Show all posts
Showing posts with label Short Stories (English). Show all posts

PENDULUM

Monday, March 25, 2024 at 6:55 AM

 

PENDULUM

By Jo Haq

25 March 2024

6:08 am


THE PENDULUM, that was the focus of my dream, at least that was what Tun was interested about, "Say what? Tun, what do you mean?"

Tun looked at me with his fierce pair of eyes and uttered, "Look at the bitch's face will you. See how satisfied she is. It is as if she has discovered the secret of the Universe. That nasty bitch!"

I looked at Margaret who was sitting on a red-white-blue stripped sofa, with a stupid grin on her face like a crazy female Joker. Tun made his way to Margaret walking slowly but steadily in his grey bush jacket. He greeted, "Madam Thatcher, how do you do?"

"Ahhh! Mahathir! How nice of you to come visit me here. I am bored sitting on this red-white stripped sofa."

"If you do not mind me asking, from a distance, I hear the tick tock of a clock radiating from this rediculous sofa of yours. What is that sound?"

"Ahah! That is the sound of my policies. Hear it! What do you hear?"

I took the opportunity to say something while walking towards them after Tun had, "We heard a tick tock of a clock from that beautiful sofa of yours"

"Don't be a hypocrite boy! Tell the bitch the sofa looks ugly", scolded Tun while staring at me, again, with his pair of big fierce eyes, only this time accompanied by a big ridiculous nose.

"Well, I am sure this boy has better EQ than you Mahathir. Let him say the good things about my sofa", says Margaret. "So, boy, what do you think it means, .... my tick tocking sofa?"

"Well, errr... "

"Shut the fuck up will you boy", says Tun while kneeling to see underneath the sofa. I too find myself kneeling to have a look at what was under the sofa, only to be distracted by Margaret's old ugly legs swinging by the edge of the floating sofa with no shadows on the floor, if there was any floor at all. "Look! Look! I see now".

"See what Tun?"

"The arm of the pendulum. It is long, longer than one would expected. When it is long, the sway takes longer time, accumulating stronger momentum, hence producing a slower but more powerful sound of tick tock".

I observed. There was a golden pendulum swaying from left to right, and right to left, making a ticking sound that irritated my ears. "Okay, I see it. But I have no idea what the yardstick would be to conclude that it is longer than what one would imagine"

"You young punks know nothing about the tick tocks of a clock's pendulum. All you do is just play with the Chinese TikTok", grumbled the old Tun.

"Mahathir, my dear friend, my pendulum is made of cast iron and plated with gold. Its density is solid and that gives a wonderful velocity to its tick tock. It is very much like the solid move of a big ship. The bigger the ship, the stronger its inertia. Ain't no one gonna stop the ship, ain't it", responded Margaret, again with her stupid grin.

"Huh!", sighed Tun while standing back up. "I shall build my own pendulum, but for my red-white striped sofa accompanied by blue cusions with yellow moons and stars motives". Tun walked away while saying, "Okay Margaret, we shall meet again to compare the sounds of our sofas. Till we meet again".

I greeted farewell, "Thank you Mrs Thatcher. It was nice to have met you", and walked away.

"My pleasure young man. Go do your own shit with whatever you can find in that pathetic peninsula of yours".

I walked behind Tun towards an open door where another Tun was waiting with a pen and a little 555 note book.

As soon as Tun reached the other Tun, he said, "Daim, hang tengok sat apa besi, emaih, kita ada. I want to build our own super tick tocking pendulum". The other Tun just jotted down some notes and gave Tun a nod. Both Tuns left before I even reached the door.

I told myself, "What the fuck was all that?"















1947 CHINESE HORSE RACING CALENDAR

Monday, March 11, 2024 at 5:22 AM

 


1947 CHINESE HORSE RACING CALENDAR

By Jo Haq

11 March 2024

4:35 am


I just woke up to a very weird dream. I was an accidental time traveller back to 1947 in Malaya. I saw a Malaysian Chinese horse racing calendar somewhere while I was there, or when I was then. Funny, the clothing was more like 1957 because I saw women wearing mini skirts and police wearing shorts.

I checked my wallet and saw that I still have some 2024 Malaysian currency notes, my Malaysian national registered identification card and all. I figured that those stuff shall be my evidence. So, I went for a quest to identify someone whom I can give, maybe a 2024 fifty Ringgit note with my signature on it and my 2024 telephone number, that is 0179881185. That someone would look for me in 2024. 

Say if he or she is twenty years old, in 1947, then in 2024 he or she would be 77 years old. So, he or she would have to look for me earlier, say in 2014, at his or her age of 67. To be safe, I thought to myself, 67 is too old. He or she might be dead already. So, I resorted to give my phone number used earlier then 2013, that is 0172508811.

And there, or then, begun my adventure of identifying that person. But every time I was about to utter the words that I suspect the person will not believe, some obstacle will happen to stop me from continuing. This happened many times.

Oh! Ya! I forgot to mention. I was not alone. I had my friend, Riza, whom used to be the successor CEO to me for MyCreative. So, we both encountered the same obtacles together. One of the obstacle was a police raid due to fear of communism spreading. Riza got captured for God knows whatever reason. He does not look like a communist. So, I was left alone.

I was tired and had given up in my attempt to give the marked fifty Ringgit note because even if I did not attempt to utter any words, the act of pulling out that note with the attention to show what was written on it would trigger some sort of obstacle.

Soon I realised, every person that I got closed to would be out of my life. I became lonely. So, I think, or thought, rather, I should just retire from my intention and just live 1947. I looked for a job as an office boy. I met a twenty year old Malay lady by the name Sofia. She looks like Zaleha from the P. Ramlee film, Antara Dua Darjat. We became good friends, but not lovers.

Despite my effort to avoid telling her or showing her where, or when, I come from, an obstacle happened anyway. She did not want to continue our friendship and refused to see me. In fact, I couldn't even find her as I suspect she may have left town or moved away. I was alone, yet again. 

What could have happened? Did she try to look into my Bally wallet? Maybe she did see my Malaysian national registration identification card. Maybe she did see my fifty Ringgit note that had my signature coupled with a written date of 10 March 1947 as well as a written declaration scribbled as, "I am Johan bin Mohamed Ishak. I was born on 29 August 1975. Call me at 0172508811 in the year 2003". 

I was so sad that that sadness had awoken me from my sleep at 4:24 am on 11 March 2024. The funny thing is, normally I would not remember the details of my dreams. This dream, however, stays vivid in my mind down to the colour of clothes worn by people in the dream, their faces, as well as stuff like the Malaysian Chinese horse racing calendar. Oh well, I am just going to have a smoke and then back to sleep. Who knows I might end up in 2047?





DADDY, CAN YOU COMPILE ALL MY ARTWORK PLEASE

Thursday, February 1, 2024 at 9:04 AM

 


Daddy, Can You Compile All My Artwork Please

By Johan Ishak

1 February 2024


IAN ZUHAYR's demise breaks my heart significantly. My ten year old son who could have been twelve now. How I wish I can use the words "broke my heart" in that first sentence but I cannot. It can never be a past tense. Hence, I embarked on a journey to live and coexist with that melancholy. As they say, "misery loves company".


One method that I use to neutralise sadness of Ian's demise is to keep on thinking about him by looking at stuff associated to him frequently; like, going to KLPAC Sentul where Ian had his last outing with me and his brothers, photos (also as the wallpaper to my phone), videos and going to the old house where Ian grew up from the age of two to ten. 


Ian used to give me his drawings of Godzilla and I can still remember vividly that he said, "Daddy, can you compile all my artwork please". So, naturally, another method of thinking about Ian is to look through his drawings that I still keep. 


One of my artwork for my solo show 'Pandamonium' at KLPAC Sentul is a caricature of 'Panda-ian' that has found its place on my room wall where I can stare at it from my bed. I have a mug with Ian's face on it on my table in my room. I visit Ian's grave a lot too. It is still fresh in my memory, the moments when I washed (mandi jenazah) Ian's body before his burial. It is also fresh in my memory, the moments when I observed Ian's vital medical equipment monitor (whatever it is called) in the hospital that showed a declining trend until it became a straight line.


I also sought and continue to seek divine intervention by praying for Ian's happiness in the afterlife with his late grandfather, Tok, after each Muslim periodic daily prayer. I imagine them holding hands walking towards the horizon of an amberdawn sunrise. God must have a plan to have taken away the boy that I produced and the man who produced me in a short space of three months (25 April 2022 and 21 July 2022 respectively).


I used to force myself to just cry alone at night before sleeping by remembering him. In the morning, forcing myself to remember Ian helps wake me up too. The best method is to talk and hug Ian's younger brother, Emil, a lot because Emil reminds me of Ian. Emil even smells like Ian. Amazing.

Soon afterwards, around the time I was at Haj in Mekkah (when I can see many chubby Turkmenistan boys who look like Ian), I had become used to Ian's absence in my life, so much so that I had absorbed the sadness to become accustomed to it. I even sat down with Datuk Izham Omar (a song composer) and Haze (a new singer) composing a song on Ian for Haze to sing entitled Zuhayrku Yang Tidur.


Like the Malay saying, "Alah bisa tegal biasa" or the Malay word, "lali"; the more you explore a particular matter, the stronger you are at it. This has helped me to continue to live and in time, I hope to live like a normal person where the sadness of the lost of family members will only become sweet memories of them. For this, I ought to say thank you to Ian for his request, "Daddy, Can You Compile All My Artwork Please".


Berita 7:57 of Awesome TV news report on Ian's demise due to Multisystem Inflamatory Syndrome for Children (MIS-C), a post-COVID19 condition.

Ian's last outing with his siblings, Daniel and Emil, at KLPAC Sentul where they viewed my solo art show entitled Caricreatures Return.



Ian's last Hari Raya photograph with his siblings, Daniel and Emil.



Ian's last photograph of him alive.


Al-Fatihah









THE STORY OF A BLACK JACKET WANDERER

Friday, July 30, 2021 at 12:59 AM

The Story of a Black Jacket Wanderer
By Jo Haq
30 July 2021


THE WORLD is damned with a pandemic. No vaccine nor cure identified. A man. Call him Aswad the Jammer. A drunkard. An artist. He is immuned to the damned virus. He walks across the city seeing people dying everywhere. Those who are still alive became hooligans. Stealing. Killing. All sorts of madness. The Government collapsed. Authorities lost control. Religion forgotten. He walks the street in black leather jacket, black t-shirt, black Converse, black half-a-sack and a black guitar. His hair uncut but not too long. He couldn't figure out why he is immuned. Later Aswad found people who are also immuned to the virus. After so much thought, him, and those with the same fate as him, share one thing in common, that could be the explanation for why they are immuned. That one thing they all have in common is clove cigarettes. So, amongst his pack are various people who had a long history of smoking loads of Sampoerna, Gudang Garam and the like. They set themselves to a mission to look for more cloves, and they ended in the ruined city of Jakarta, where he met his namesis, the Gangster Lord, Pak Darsono, who controls the harvesting of cloves. Darsono holds the currency far valuable than money or gold. He controls Jakarta. Soon he may control the World for where else can you find cloves, if not in Indonesia. Aswad and his Black Squad soon find themselves in action in their quest to acquire cloves. And, the saga begins ........




AND LET THERE BE FRUITS AND NUTS

Friday, July 23, 2021 at 11:02 PM







AND LET THERE BE FRUITS AND NUTS

By Jo Haq and Merah Rahman


A drama of fruit figurines - I am King declared the Durian. Who is worthy to be my Queen and members of my court? Hmmm.... who do you think should be Queen? It has to be the Dragon Fruit. And the Wild Berries shall be amongst the palace folks. The Dragon Fruit has to plead its case. What justifies the Dragon Fruit to be the Queen? It is the only fruit whose seeds are randomly scattered within with no devine architecture in its arrangement. It shall be evil. It shall be chaos... but full of passion. Then the Pineapple will claim he is to be the King's advisor as he has eyes everywhere and even if his head is cut off an buried, he will be reborn again to serve the King. Yes, let's appoint the Pineapple. Who should take care of the kingdom’s treasures and riches? This is a tricky one. A Jackfruit has been accused of swallowing all gold nuggets belonging to the King. Hmmm.... sounds like a modern day politician. Off with his head. There is no place for him in this court. Maybe it should be the Banana. He has nothing to hide so much so he wears his heart outside for the world to see. And bananas would lend its leaves to protect all from heavy rain. How noble is the banana. Who shall protect them all? Hmmm.... this is a tricky one too. Maybe it is the Kings children themselves. They are born armored and would not betray the King. No.. no.. they shall be as expected, born not to work. Maybe it will be the Salaks. Shielded with thick skin. Like armours. And sometimes the smell is enough to scare off the weak hearted. Magnificent choice! We need a Court Jester. Something funny or sarcastic. So, a sharp acidic fruit or something with a funny shape. Buy why? Perhaps the colour should be vibrant? Oooh... Maybe it should be the Kedondong. With its sharp sour taste that accompanies the harshness of reality and inside him he holds the big hairy truth. I disagree. I want something vibrant. Ok, present your case with your choice. I vote for the red, green and yellow Capsicums. Basis of proposal please. They look funny. That is all. One last verdict needed. Someone to lead the prayers. Oooh... this is a tough one too. Someone who is full of sustenance. That fuels the spiritual hunger of all. Coconut? No. Someone with many breasts like the Goddess Artemis. Blackberries? Sort of like multiple nipples or mini boobs. Nooooo.... Papayas. Hahha yes! And the coconut you mentioned... he is the dude imprisoned in the King's dungeon. Because he is a coconut case that cannot be saved. Maybe we should pick the villain fruits now. Coconut the crazy advisor. Cempedak and Nangka want to be King and Queen both equally corrupt. The world is unfair when they associate dark colours to evil. Should we apply that generalisation? Yes they equate dark colours to evil or poverty or stupidity. Yes. It’s like a political satire hidden in fable of fruit figurines. Coffee. Cocoa. Let's just create a whole army of foes from the nut family then. And they still have the lighter colours at the top ruling over them a.k.a. Nangka, Cempedak and Coconut. Yes. Like the Pigs in The Animal Farm. Playing puppet master. They rally the grapes, plums and blackberries working them up crying foul play and oppression. Gaining and fanning the grassroot’s rage. Not realising they are just pawns. With their soft skins, they will be squished in the attempt of power grabbing. Not realising Coconut, Cempedak and Nangka are quietly sacrificing the Grapes to turn them into wine for their own consumption. Blaming King Durian and Queen Dragon Fruit of the disappearance of their children. It is indeed a cruel Fruits and Nuts World. At last, the society will collapse into one big fruit punch with no redemption and no hope.




By Jo Haq and Merah Rahman
23 July 2021
10:51 pm
KL Eco City / Bukit Gita Bayu



THE LEMON THAT TALKS

Tuesday, May 25, 2021 at 12:43 AM

THE LEMON THAT TALKS

I hear voices. They come from a bunch of lemons. Five lemons to be exact. Actually, I hear only a voice. But I cannot figure it out which of the five is making the sound? I listen carefully. The voice, it rhymes. It sings a beautiful poem about how it misses its father. I look again. Four lemons have their asses pointed out. One lemon has its pointy head protruding. So, I figure, that must be the talking lemon. But it has no mouth. I took the lemon and I cut it into two. I squeeze its juice until the juice runs down my elbow. I squeeze it again and again into my mouth to kill any damned virus that may have colonised my throat. I look out the window and I sing the rhythm of the poem. The poem about how I miss my father.


By Jo Haq
12:26 am
25 May 2021
KL Eco City


THE GREEN NINJA INCIDENT

Thursday, May 13, 2021 at 8:05 AM

The Green Ninja Incident

I was forced to fight a nasty Jujitsu Master who wore bright green ninja costume. He showed all his moves. Of course, I didn't know any martial arts to begin with but because I had my sinusitis attack, I sneezed and with that, he got blown to dusts. So, I won the fight unexpectedly.


 

THE PURPLE HAZE

Wednesday, April 14, 2021 at 1:56 AM


THE PURPLE HAZE
By Ivy Valentine
14 April 2021
1:41 am
Bukit Gita Bayu



ONCE UPON A TIME THERE WAS A MAN CALLED JOHAN. He was in his apartment feeling bored out of his mind. He did all the usual things to kill boredom but it was one of those nights where it was looming larger than it usually does. Leaning back against his grey sofa he started blowing ring smokes from his favourite Sampoerna cigarette. Suddenly one of the ring smokes grew bigger and Bigger and it grew so big it was the size of the ceiling of his living room and colours and sounds started emerging from the ring smoke. He stared at it feeling fascinated yet fearful, when it suddenly descended upon him and everything in the apartment changed to a purple tinge. Even his skin glowed with a hint of purple and the smell of lavender overpowered his senses. He looked at his hands and started feeling his face as it he had an odd sensation. Something had drastically changed. Running over to the mirror he looked at himself and didn’t recognise himself for a moment. His crazy curls were no longer there and was replaced by dead straight hair but everything else remained the same and the purple tinge was gone.

He was struggling to remember what he was thinking about just before that and memories he never knew he had started emerging in his mind. In this alternate universe he was a rock star, never been married, never been in love,  never wanted kids and all he ever wanted to do and ever did was write songs that made the world sing. All memories of the other universe melted into the background and without realising it, he embraced this new reality, and the days went on as if he never lived the other life. And then one day, he was on his private jet on the way to one of his tour. The jet suddenly stalled, smoke came out of the engine and the pilot was frantically telling him to buckle up as they had to make an emergency landing. By some miracle the pilot managed to land the jet on a remote island of the coast of some country. Johan couldn’t even figure out where they were cause he was too high. He was always high on something. He never knew where he was or who he was sleeping with. He only knew that he had to get up on stage and rock his heart out when his manager told him to. 

His manager was passed out on the galley as he had knocked his head against the overhead compartment as he didn’t manage to buckle in. For the first time in his life as Johan the rock star, his mind became crystal clear and a sense of fear took over him. He looked into the cockpit and the pilot was passed out too. He stumbled over his manager at the sight of blood on the co-pilot's head and reached for the door and opened it. They barely made it and he was suddenly for the first time in his life glad to be alive. The sun was beginning to set and the dying rays of the day made everything look like it was showered in rays of gold and amber. He squinted his eyes not believing what he saw before him. It was a man who looked exactly like him but much much older. His flowing locks snow white with age wearing a top hat and holding a red Fender guitar. Johan opened his mouth to say something but the old man just held up his hand to silence him and started playing the guitar. It was a melody that he never heard of. It was so beautiful that he could see all the notes forming images of everything that ever came to his crazy imagination: flying pigs, and ox smoking with a top hat; and an alien in the guise of a human save for the shape of her skull that was bellied by the hair that was ever growing at an alarming rate.

The old man kept playing and playing one mystical song after another. The hours went by until dawn is about to break. Johan stood there hypnotised and finally the old man played his final song. So, as his fingers danced furiously across the red Fender, the notes wrapped around Johan and he suddenly started remembering his other life. Everything that he went through, the beautiful, the bad, the ugly, the happiness and the loneliness. He finally understood the meaning of life and that even with the heartbreaks he went through he would rather have that as it brought him with it the good that he never got in this universe like memories of drawing with his son. He would have given anything to return back to his former life. He cried for his losses but he cried even more as he now realised those losses were nothing compared to what he still had in his life and he took it all for granted. The tears were so overwhelming it started to blend with the tides and the old man started walking towards the sea and Johan followed him. They kept on walking into the sea until it reached their necks but they still kept on walking and Johan could no longer tell if the saltiness came from the waves of the sea or the tears in his eyes.

They still walked on even though they had to struggle against the waves that were growing larger and larger until the sea filled their lungs, their ears and their eyes. With salt water in his mouth and lungs, Johan coughed violently but still kept on walking into the oceans arms. Drowning, he couldn’t stop coughing. He was coughing so hard that he woke up with a start. He was back on his sofa feeling the burn of the cigarette on his fingers. He could still feel the tears running down his face but now they were no longer tears of loneliness. He was just happier than he ever had been before. He went to look in the mirror - his eyes were bloodshot but his crazy curls were back. He finally understood the meaning of his life and why he had to go through everything that he had and was counting the days when the weekend comes for him to see his boys back again.


~~~ THE END ~~~

WHAT SHOULD I ASK MAK FOR MY BIRTHDAY PRESENT?

Sunday, November 17, 2019 at 10:35 AM
By Jo Haq
spanapurba.blogspot.com


Mak asked me, "Oiii, what do you want for your birthday present?"

I said, "Mak bagi seluaq dalam saja lah. Che punya seluaq dalam semua dah berlubang, getah longgaq semua. Dah ada bekaih kuning semua. Dah 5 tahun Che tak beli seluaq dalam."

Mak could only say, "Hang ni loqlaq la!"


A CALL FROM THE BANK

at 10:14 AM
By Jo Haq
spanapurba.blogspot.com


"Ring! Ring!"

"Hello Sir, do you have a minute?"

"Yes o.k, who is this?"

"I am Suresh from PLM Bank. We have studied your existing facilities and we are pleased to inform you that you are eligible for our special rate personal loan at 4.5% per annum. We can pre-approve your loan now but if you like to take up this facility, kindly inform us the desired amount."

"Error........ Hmmmmm......... I....... want...... two point six billion, boleh?"

Suresh hung up.


CAN I HAVE CHICKEN PLEASE?

at 10:04 AM
By Jo Haq
spanapurba.blogspot.com










"Hi there, may I have snack plate please?"

The counter keeper at KFC said, "Oh! sorry Sir. At the moment we do not have chicken to serve. May I suggest mashed potatoes?"

I could only say, "Huh? But, but..... you are KFC! How can you not have chicken to serve me?"


BROKE FREE FROM SLAVERY JUST FOR THE WEEKEND

Thursday, November 14, 2019 at 8:27 AM
By Jo Haq
spanapurba.blogspot.com

















During the weekend I went to Ipoh for my alma mater alumni gathering. Half way there, speeding on the NKVE, I realised that I had left my smart phone at home. I panicked for a while only to discover that I was actually relieved. Relieved from being the slave to technology. It was plain and utter peace of mind. No one could reach me neither can I fulfil my obsessive compulsive disorder of checking my phone every other minute. It was blissful. Soon I had forgotten about the phone when my mind was occupied with Nasi Vanggey, Nasi Ganja and the tonnes of other delights that Ipoh can offer.

Today that freedom has been taken away from me. I am back in KL. My smart phone is back in my jeans pocket vibrating and ringing itself like a little irritating swine. I knew I was back in slavery when my phone had these to bemuse me:

878 Whassap Updates
739 Telegram Updates
675 Twitter Updates
546 Instagram Updates
443 Facebook Updates
103 new work emails
56 new Yahoo emails
16 Missed Calls
7 SMSs
1 Application Update

..... and we say we are liberated?


HOW DIFFICULT IS IT TO DESIGN A PROPER TOILET?

Wednesday, November 13, 2019 at 7:36 PM
By Jo Haq
spanapurba.blogspot.com


I hate public toilets. They are full of inadequacies. Incomplete utility value to the extent that it is an annoying nuisance rather than convenience. People can spend loads of money to have the nicest walls, ceilings, lightings and such, but they refuse to spend on proper toilets. These are the issues I have with our public toilets:

1. Dirty flooring
2. Limited toilet seats. I hate those "mencangkung" toilets coz I cannot sit comfortably
3. Where the hell is the water? Bloody toilet papers are useless!
4. When you finally found one with water, it has no toilet papers. What the hell.... again!
5. Wet flooring means I can never open my shoes coz I'd wet my socks
6. No hooks to hang my jeans? Am I supposed to hold it on my lap or let it hang below my knees?
7. And where am I supposed to put my sling bag (or hand bags for women)? On the floor?
8. Occasionally you'll have some with broken locks and end up holding the door close with one hand
9. That nasty auto water fountain shit will either hit your tummy or your jacket hanging on the door opposite it
10. With all that, they ask me to pay? Just for trying to pee/past motion the hardest way possible?

What crappy toilets we have.


ORDERING A DRINK

at 8:37 AM
By Jo Haq
spanapurba.blogspot.com


I said, "Teh O Limau Tak Mau Gula satu". The makcik wrote this on her notebook, "Tolol".



THE DEMONIC DI666ITAL

Tuesday, November 5, 2019 at 10:10 AM
By Jo Haq
spanapurba.blogspot.com


Quote of the day: "..... that is the problem with digital. It disrupts! Dajjal's tool. Imagine last time 1 unit of music sale is a cd album worth RM40, then cd singles at RM7, now 1 song on spotify less than 99 Sen? Suddenly the overall value of sales fell dramatically. Artists cannot survive with record sales alone and they need to go 360 degree doing endorsement, concerts and what not. This wave is extending into TV and radio business as well. The players in the industry, any industry in fact, must change to embrace contemporary movements. Or else, we'll be in a Kodak Moment. Kodak Moment is not 'Smile, click! click!'. Kodak Moment is a sad case of American Chapter 11 Bankrupcy proceeding."


MUSIC IS PSYCHOLOGY

at 9:50 AM
By Jo Haq
spanapurba.blogspot.com
























Izham : Jo, I had issues answering some set of IQ questions. I think my mind is not as sharp.

Jo: Boss. If your mind is not sharp, then it must be flat or diminished. Highly likely you are experiencing a distortion or a delay overdrive. You will be out of tuned from reality. But hey, just relax. That is life. It is only an arpeggio of mishappenings. You'll just have to tune your strings of thoughts and hopefully, all these are just minor bits in the whole scheme of things.


DUCKLING

at 9:35 AM
By Jo Haq
spanapurba.blogspot.com


On the first of September, the ducklings went round and round. The ducklings just went around. The ducklings, they didn't care. They went around anyway. What do you care? Mind your own business people.


OLD WOMAN WITH BLACK COFFEE

Thursday, October 31, 2019 at 12:31 AM
By Jo Haq
spanapurba.blogspot.com


An old woman came to me and said, "Hi...  I haven't seen you for so long. How is your wife Raziah doing?". 

"Errrr.... my wife is Roslina mam... not Raziah."

"Huh? You are Khalid right?"

"Errr.... no... not that I am aware".  She took a sip of her black coffee and flew away gently.


THE NINCOMPOOT CAMERAMAN

Wednesday, October 30, 2019 at 4:33 PM
By Jo Haq
spanapurba.blogspot.com

















A camera man with his camera focused at me. I stood still with a stupid grin for like... 10 seconds or more... only to realise that I really look stupid coz it was not a photographic attempt. It was a video shoot from a camera. Bugger!! He smiled and said, "Sir no need to smile too long coz it is a video". Now you tell me you nincompoop! Hahaahah.

"BERSATU LAWAN PUSPAKOM"

at 4:11 PM
By Jo Haq
spanapurba.blogspot.com
















PUSPAKOM said, "Bang. RM95.50 ye"

I reached my wallet and there was only RM91.00. "Errr... hmm... boleh pakai credit card tak?"

"Tak", says the PUSPAKOM lady with an unfriendly face. She must be tired especially fasting in the hot small cubical with a small fan by her side. Out of desperation, I walked to the car behind me. The owner is an old Chinese uncle.

"Uncle, errrr.... so so sorry. Can I borrow RM5.00 please. This is my business card. I will transfer RM10.00 direct to your bank account now via Maybank2u...... Can lah uncle"

"Eiii.. lu gila ka? Gua mana ingat gua punya bank account number. Ni ambik ini RM5.00 gua kasi free sama lu. Kita Melayu, Cina, India tak kira bangsa semua kena bersatu lawan ini PUSPAKOM kasi pening kepala orang."

"Ahahahahahhah.... adoi... thank you lah Uncle", with my hand gently taking the RM5.00 from his rough hand and I offered him a smile. A smile from a Malaysian to another without any concern over the colour of our skin as long as we can help each other.

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